Log in

No account? Create an account
07 January 2015 @ 03:23 pm
I had this big long entry written out about the shit I dealt with throughout 2014. But you know what? Who fucking cares. What matters is I have a roof over my head, the best boyfriend I could hope for, and a camera.

I have some really exciting things coming up with my photography. I am kinda bursting with how proud of myself I am and how fucking cool these upcoming projects are. But, as always, I take it with a grain of salt until it happens.

As always, I'm more active on Instagram than here. My username is @parrty
04 October 2014 @ 01:33 am
I know nobody goes on Livejournal anymore but I have to update somewhere other than Facebook. I've been wanting to get onto an agency for a long time, but most artist/photography agencies won't touch you unless you are known and pulling a steep amount annually on your own. Every so often, they might take a chance on someone, but it's rare. I've been biding my time for years because I didn't want to fuck up my first chance.

But I fucking did it.

I have a manager. I was accepted onto an artist agency. That is all.
18 September 2014 @ 12:59 am
It had been a hot minute since I've posted here. When I last left you, I was living in Humboldt and we had just basically gotten saved by his grandparents.

To say this year has been a complete fucking shitshow is such an understatement.

A big blow, though, was the house I had grown up in was foreclosed on. It's such a long story. Dom and I came home from Humboldt in May and I literally lived out of my car for about 3 months. After a lot of back and forth between my uncle's house (where my mom is) and Dom's dad's house, I left for Florida to see my dad. It had been almost 2 years, so spending time with him was a lot of fun. My grandma had an 80th birthday. I know this sounds selfish, but they were all very aware of everything I've talked about here, getting robbed, my grandpa dying, losing our house, and not once did anyone ask, "how are you?" Maybe because they know and don't want to get into it. Maybe they genuinely don't care, it is my dad's family and they're separated, so why bother? Everyone has their own lives though, so maybe it didn't even cross their minds. My dad almost convinced me to move there. After remembering, "oh right, I fucking hate Florida!" I came home to San Diego and pretty literally less than a day later,made the 14-hour drive to Humboldt to see Dom (who went back and is in his final semester FINALLY) and took the long way home. A glorious, weeklong, desperate need to separate from reality.

Somewhere in this mess (June, I think), I had gotten a job as a personal assistant to someone who started off as a pretty pleasant person. I think the 'personal' aspect of my job became a bit much when on my first day, she confided in me about her affair. Then had me pretend nothing was wrong in front of her husband, lie about where she was, and even asked me to make dinner reservations for her and the poor sack of potatoes she was seeing on the side. Pair that up with huge emotional baggage, materialistic as fuck, some degree of body dysmorphic disorder, "I just don't get along with girls" mentality while bashing every girl friend she's ever had, not to mention I was her fourth assistant in less than a year and I already knew I was on my way out. She fired me via email while I was in Florida on the grounds that I made "too many mistakes". And that her company is small and can't afford ANY mistakes.

I should also add that she implemented a shit ton of changes such as inventory software and an ENTIRE OPERATING SYSTEM, while having said inventory strewn all over her house, without training me on anything. And, throwing me under the bus when her husband questioned me on why I did certain things. Uh, because I've been here three weeks and this is how it was when I started?

So, I basically got fired for not knowing how to do things she didn't train me to do, leaving me to figure it out (she also admitted that she herself didn't know how to do what she tasked me with, such as commercial shipping and charge backs people filed against her company).

I was mad about it, but I'm not now. I was more angry that I could no longer afford the apartment (that she helped me find) I was just approved for. Some attorney friends suggested I sue her based on wrongful termination. Other friends suggested I blackmail her into giving me severance, but is it really worth it? I still have to go to her house and pick up my last check. I've been biding my time because I have no idea what to do or how to act or what to say. Should I be a bitch? Let her know I could destroy her marriage? What good would that do?

Anyway! I upgraded my camera to a 5D Mark III and I'm really fucking stoked on it. I grit my teeth and bought the 600-EX RT speedlight AND the ST-E3-R3. Its a mouthful, but I can wirelessly trigger that flash off camera and that's pretty cool. In all these years I've taken photos, never once have I had an interest in lighting. Gotta start somewhere. I'm learning a lot and shooting a lot, and that's all I need to be happy.

Here's two photos of Tasha and Alex. Sorry for the Instagram quality. Add me on there if you please!

24 March 2014 @ 06:40 pm
When Dom and I were first deciding to move up to Humboldt, everyone told me that it was kind of the "make it or break it" point in a relationship, meaning if we could survive a move together, we'd be fine. I didn't really felt like that applied to us because of our previous living situation (which sounds super complicated but it's not. Basically, we both lived with our parents whose houses are on the same street and both his and my parents divorced around time. Our moms are friends so Dom's mom moved in, followed by Dom).

But I'm convinced if we can make it through everything we've been through in the past few months, we're golden.

We are still working with police. Yesterday we positively identified the guy and his girlfriend in some ATM photos that the police showed us. The cop said they'll be putting a warrant out for both of their arrests with multiple felony charges. The guy and his girlfriend deposited the check less than an hour after we wrote it and closed the account a week later, and have been evicted from the house. Dom and I have let that $3675 go and don't expect to ever see it again. We've let go of it. The cop said the actual houseowner has been super helpful in giving him all the info he needs on the couple. The cop said he talked to the girlfriend's dad, haha.

We got some help from Dom's grandparents and are no longer living off Dollar Tree flank steaks and fake shredded cheese that won't even melt. Dom was on spring break this past week so we drove to Redding with the intention of staying the night until we realized we hate it. Then Dom was trying to take a picture on the Sun Dial Bridge, leaned over the side and his iPhone fell out of his shirt pocket. Aghhh haha. It was right on the shore, a heavenly mix of "it smashed on the rocks THEN fell in the water". Luckily, we can now pay the $200 insurance deductable for a new one.

I'm just so so so so so grateful for Dom's secret rich grandparents. We're not gonna be homeless!

Thanks for your comments, by the way. They put a big smile on my face. I know not many people use LJ anymore so it means a lot that you guys read my babbling bullshit, haha 
15 February 2014 @ 11:55 pm

I need to vent this.

Since we've gotten to Humboldt, the following has happened. We have been here less than a month.

1. That house? We picked a date to see it, met with the owner, took a tour of the house and signed a lease. Then, the "owner" ran off with our money. $3675.

2. Filed a police report. We have been dealing with them and some investigators.

3. We stayed in a hotel for over 2 weeks, losing money everyday for food and a roof over our heads

4. We finally found a roommate. Her previous roommate moved out and left the bedroom absolutely filthy. He claims we are just as responsible for cleaning it. What fucking planet are you from?

5. Dom lost his debit card. Someone stole it and spent over $120 at the bar.

6. He wrote me a check and I mobile deposited it so we would have some money. I'm an idiot and I forgot my pin.

7. I forgot my pin because I spent every cent I have coming here and haven't used my card in a month. I'm an idiot.

8. My mom deposits $68 into another bank account. We're saved until I get a new pin sent to me!

9. The bank cancels that card because of the Target breach thing. Therefore, we have no money until I get the new card and pin sent to my San Diego home and have it forwarded to me in Humboldt, and the same with my card to which I forgot the pin, and the same for Dom's new debit card.

And finally, my grandpa died today.

I want to go home. But I can't, because over half of Dom's money was stolen and we spent almost $700 at a hotel, Dom has enough left for exactly one month's rent. Meaning I need to find a job to support us both until May. if I leave, he will be forced to leave. And if he leaves, he probably won't be let back in and will be required to pay all the student loans he was given back ASAP instead of monthly like normal.

I'm trying really hard to hold it the fuck together but this year has been a completely fucking shitshow.

16 January 2014 @ 01:17 am
Update, Dom is going back to school in Humboldt and I agreed to go with him. I've been crazy stressed about finding a place and money. We were going to leave on Monday, but Dom got really sick. Everything happens for a reason. Turns out there was some dumb delay in Grossmont getting the transcripts to HSU and he was supposed to get his financial aid today, but because they RECEIVED his transcripts today, he doesn't get it until the next disbursement date... next Wednesday. The day AFTER school starts. If we had left on Monday and driven 14 hours to Humboldt, only to find out we wouldn't be getting any money for another week and a half, we'd. be. fucked. I'm so happy we didn't leave Monday.

Luckily, we were able to secure a 3 bedroom house really close to everything, and it even has a white picket fence. It's a cute place. We offered another month's rent up front and the renter agreed to reserve it for us. They're even letting us stay in it when we get up there, even though the official move in date isn't until Feb 1st.

Obviously we're stoked that we can afford this place, but what I'm even more stoked on is that they agreed to rent it month to month (all the houses I've seen are even more expensive, and a year lease) and that if we want, we have the option to get a few roommates. But we don't have to. But we can. But we don't have to! Cool!

This is it. It's long, not wide.


So now the official plan is, we're leaving Sunday night to arrive Monday (14 hour drive). School starts Tuesday, we move in Wednesday. We need a hotel for 2 nights. We don't have a lot of money until that financial aid kicks in. Our biggest concern is getting our cars there and getting a cheap motel room for two nights. Wish us luck, we're gonna need it. :|
27 August 2013 @ 07:58 pm
it's been a long time since i've posted. my only current issues are money, as usual.

but look, i made a legit website.


i have some plans on the horizon but need to rebuild my portfolio. so many of my pictures are over 2-3 years old. i need to get over my fear of working with new people (not to say i don't love shooting my friends but our schedules never match up, so it never works out, so i can never shoot), because there are some people i'd be interested in shooting on model mayhem that are in the san diego area. i'm also considering reaching out to some photo agents, but it's difficult if you don't already pull $100k+ on your own. sometimes they take chances to groom someone with potential, that's all i really have to bet on right now.

i need to get my money issues together. i'm beginning to think a credit card was a bad choice. not that i'm going nuts, but i find myself relying on it when i really shouldn't. badbad.


ps don't forget http://www.jessyparr.com
03 May 2013 @ 03:31 pm

hey lil loves. i'm still around.

i got a job through a friend for a flower company. it's seasonal, but long hours don't feel long and it's so nice to have a paycheck. i got my tax refund and although it was the most i've ever gotten back (over 1k) it quickly dwindled due to bills and payments.

although i've gotten lucky a couple times. my macbook's logic board failed. the apple store charged me $310 flat for "anything that needed fixing". i could only come up with the logic board, a new battery ($120 by itself) and a new disc drive since mine would just spit out any cd i put in. i got it back with all those fixed, a new keyboard because the light under it was broken, two new fans, and a new top casing. it feels like new laptop. i also got a flat tire and because discount tire will only fix two, i went in with my measly $230 and they took a look at my tires. they said my tires were so awful (i'm not dumb, i knew this. they were baaare bones) that they couldn't let it leave that way. they charged me for two tires and gave me two free ones. four brand new tires. i cried, y'all.

this was on my statement from discount tire.

as usual, i miss my friends and going out doing things i took for granted when i had a steady paycheck. it's really hard for me to go to a bar and spend $5/drink. i know i don't need to drink to have fun but then i consider gas and cover or anything else and i just get so bummed. i think it really kind of hit home for me when i went to see a friend's band and someone who, while not my best friend but i still valued his friendship, kind of brushed me off, followed by a really awkward silence. i'm not used to that! what happened?

anyway. i had a bit of a scare healthwise (this happens to me sometimes and i think, oh shit! better do something about it before i die! but nothing really ever comes of it because tbh i can be a pretty stubborn brat) but i got pretty freaked out, i have really high blood pressure which is reletively (~2 years) new to me. it's weird, you can't even make a fist because the skin is so swollen. it feels like being a human water ballon... stretching from the inside out. so dom has been a really supportive partner in doing now what is the paleo way of eating. it's simple, but fun and feels normal and natural. it's been some time now but i started by doing what i always do when i start something new - stick to what i know. i tried being a vegetarian once and i ate peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for a month. i'm started to venture out and try some new stuff and it's actually pretty awesome. i look back on what i thought was good before - juicing, hcg, every other diet fad i've ever tried. i realize now that those things were never a long term solution. i find (since i am as i mentioned before, a bit of a stubborn brat) that if i really want something that is not considered paleo or whatever the case, but i reeeeeally want it for whatever reason, i just have a small amount so i can get over it.

so, that's my update! i'm not dead (yet) and fish oil supplements has been my greatest discovery so far. i still take a ton of pictures, some of which are on my flickr, tumblr or instagram (username: parrty). bye babies.
08 January 2013 @ 12:59 pm
hey y'all.

bbbllllueuueheehghhghhCollapse )
anyway all those pictures are from my instagram which i use way more than pretty much anything. username: parrty

i've also been working on a lil brand called eatbeast. that has an instagram too, the username is eatbeast. on tumblr the username is eatbeastco.

i'm still around, doing stuff. i recently got a fire lit under my ass because after dom gave me the eatbeast magazine, we were talking about how i don't take pictures as often anymore and how i get discouraged and all that. a few years ago i took a color photo class at the community college nearby and the teacher failed me. dom has a friend who is heavily involved in the photo department, knows the professors well and hangs out with them a lot. the teacher who failed me is a friend of hers. dom and her were catching up and he told her about the magazine he made for me. (dom later relayed to me) after talking about it for a bit, she revealed he failed me because he saw potential and felt i didn't care/wasn't trying. that seriously bummed me out. i don't know if i worded all of that correctly. that's ok though, i know what i meant.

anyway, tata livejournal. nice seeing you again. add me on instagram, @parrty and @eatbeast.